all dressed up with nothing to exploit for personal gain

• Starting to regret hiring Axl Rose to be the greeter at my new restaurant called The Jungle
• How we took too much MDMA and tried to make a documentary about how not to make a documentary on too much MDMA, and why it won an award
• Nothing better than watching the person you love sleep then quietly then leaving so they never knew you were in their apt
• Hey, teenage girls, what stupid thing are you into now? I want to crank out a shitty book and turn it into seven movies.
• Princess Leia is now a Disney Princess, but she was bought and paid for... like a slave.
• I'm pitching a movie to SyFy about a bunch of sharks joining NATO but I just can't come up with a title
• I understand people who are self destructive because I've never seen a pool cover I didn't secretly want to dance on.
• Women are a lot like apples because otherwise this analogy doesn't work at all.
• I'm not sure how important intention really is. Broken glass doesn't intend to hurt you, but that doesn't mean you should eat it.
• Rain ruined my plans. Drought wouldn't do that.
• Getting a head start on gaining weight in time for the winter.
• Now that Japan is having a robot Olympics, will they also have a robot special Olympics for broken robots?
• A lot of people have a fear of spiders. Imagine how bad insects fear spiders.