If Ina Garten married Danny Devito she would be Ina Garten Devito.
BREAKING: "Monday Night Football" Changing Name to "Scared Straight"
The game Guitar Hero inspired my friend to learn guitar. Next, they should make a video game about talking to your kids.
A gaggle of geese, a murder of crows, a menopause of stewardesses.
Heat index of 110. There are so many shirtless dudes in L.A. right now it's impossible to tell who's in the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
I'm no fashion expert, Ms Ground Zero protestor, but your 'never forgive' sign clashes with that crucifix you're wearing.
Shot out of bed last night in an icy cold sweat with the sudden realization that Gnip Gnop was just ping ping backwards.
Turkey Burgers: creating quiet disappointment since 1997.
"And for those intolerable downtimes scanning your eyes from your iPhone to iWatch, it's the all-new iForearm!" #AppleLive
A new survey says only 36 percent of Americans can name the three branches of government, so shame on you Education Branch!
my book club evolved into a fight club so gradually I almost didn't notice
*Financial Status*: Just rinsed off a paper plate.
it's just so crazy to think that kids born in 14 will be turning 2000 this year
"My fellow Americans, I have authorized action to degrade and destroy Adobe's ability to push updates to devices." [Cheering in streets]
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