Oh cool, I've been selected to reject taking a quick survey.

• CNN: We know little about Robin Williams' death and won't mindlessly speculate. Here are literally 37 people we pay to mindlessly speculate.
• If no one can lift Thor's hammer, can you lift Thor, while he is holding his hammer?
• If I died and went to hell, it would take me a while to figure out I wasn't at work.
• Curiosity Rover is our stoner friend texting us pictures of cool rocks he found.
• "Righty tighty, lefty loosey" works for both unscrewing things and political parties.
• When my electronics get too hot, they freeze
• Home is where you take your bra off
• never feel bad for getting excited over small things. good hair day? brag about it. two sodas from the vending machine? throw a party.
• I'd like to think nothing good ever comes of violence, but I was a kid once. I went to a party with a piñata. I know better.
• The only things me and my parents have in common: a love of donuts! #parentsjustdonutunderstand
• I have worked at a lot of start-up companies and the most popular buzzwords by far are self-deprecating jokes about using buzzwords.
• Most of being an adult is just finding the nearest source of caffeine.