
A study found that being cool in HS does not lead to being successful. The study was conducted by Moms who mean well but aren’t helping.

Are you tired of every day being the same? Congratulations, you’re an adult!

Conspiracy theory for conspiracy theorists: Your conspiracy theories were planted by the government to distract you from real conspiracies.

If you pitch a non-superhero, non-remake, non-sequel film in Hollywood they send your family to a work camp.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me 189,463 times, you're the editor of HuffPo.

Accidentally shoved a girl I didn't like to the left in the grocery store thinking I was on Tinder.

Watching my kids play the Xbox Kinect and it’s taking me back to when I was a kid and we had this great game called playing outside.

"Interesting story. I will now find a way to relate your story to something in my life so I can start talking about me again" - Los Angeles

Aliens watching our media must assume we are being implored to show allegiance to our ruler, a mysterious entity named "Geico."
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